I found this interesting post over at The Rebelution blog. It is listed on the right side of my page. Click on it and check these two young men out. The particular post I found interesting is below and is titled, “Adolescence is Permanent.” A few snippets below.
In America the percentage of 26-year-olds living with their parents has doubled since 1970, from 11% to 20%. That means one in five American 26-year-olds lacks the financial independence, personal responsibility, or courage to leave the shelter of their parent’s roof.
How do we explain this? Unfortunately, we can almost predict that the world is going to say something like: This is OK! Irresponsibility is good!
In fact, several of the prominent social scientists that have studied this new life stage see it as a positive development. They argue that these “adultescents” aren’t lazy; they’re just reaping the fruit of decades of American affluence and social liberation. They believe that “this new period is a chance for young people to savor the pleasures of irresponsibility, search their souls and choose their life paths.”
Are we contributing to this phenomenon?
They go on,
Only a culture with exceedingly low expectations of young people can view the existence of these twentysomething Peter Pans as a positive thing. A proper look at the situation will lead us to the conclusion that whatever cultural machinery used to turn kids into grownups has broken down and that their replacements: adolescence, and now, adultescences, create “adults” without the moral backbone and financial wherewithal necessary to take their place in the adult world.
It is becoming increasingly obvious that putting off responsibility does not prepare us for responsibility. And that only radical action will allow us to escape the irresponsibility and ill preparedness our culture cultivates and expects.
Are we expecting too little of our kids? Should we be more and more treating them as adults with adult responsibilities?
I think so…
September 20, 2007 at 1:59 am
Hi,
It is true…. I mean adults have to learn to take up responsibility. This is a scary phenomenon. Hopefully American youth will learn what is better for their future sooon!
Till then we shall have to wait and watch the ‘Wasss up!’ generation
Minal
September 20, 2007 at 7:08 am
Minal, thanks for posting. Yes hopefully we will all wake up and realize that we are really setting the bar far too low. I have five children, though two of them are married and out of the house. My remaining three boys are of great concern as I seek to raise up young men by God’s grace!
Les
September 20, 2007 at 2:24 pm
Les,
I have huge concerns for this issue as well.
With this in mind, we have recently explained to 4 of our 5 children that are still “under our roof” (one is overseas and 2 in college, one in HS still) that we have the following standards/goals for them.
Upon graduating from college we will follow the 3-6-10-10-12 principle.
3 = within 3 months we will no longer provide them a cell phone (whether they provide one for themselves is up to them)
6 = within 6 months we will no longer provide a car for them (again, whether they provide one for themselves is up to them)
10 = 10% tithe to the Lord (between them and the Lord)
10 = 10% tithe to contribute to the cost of running the home (their room and board)
12 = within 12 months, shoot for having your own living space outside the home.
There will, of course, be a “spirit” to all of this since any of them may face cicrcumstances which make this impossible. But, we at least have this “out there” for them and for us to shoot for.
Bill
September 20, 2007 at 3:03 pm
I was talking to a friend from the Middle East about this issue. I was trying to explain the importance of young people getting “out on their own,” “out from under their parents’ roof,” etc. She was having a really hard time understanding. She comes from a culture where families continue living together communally. In her observation of American culture, she was more concerned about the problem of isolation between family members fostered by an emphasis put on radical independence, privacy, and individualistic autonomy. She pointed out that children can live with their parents and not be irresponsible or lazy. Interesting…